Letting Go
In my Best Relationship Ever program I talk about how by mid-life most people have lost their belief in love – and life. Do YOU trust in love and life?
My discovery of “the split” prompted the realization that we want to experience romantic love, but no longer belief it’s possible. If this is you, it puts you in an obvious bind. You want something you no longer belief you can have.
In talking with a close friend I asked her what she thought it was about, this lack of faith in love. Her response was remarkable. She said:
By mid-life most people don’t believe that anything wonderful can happen to them.
Her statement rang true to me. As I look around it does appear that many people become “deadened” and don’t seem fully alive, vibrant, and excited about life. What do you think as you look around you? How about in your own life?
What happens? How do we lose our belief in life?
Do You Trust In Life?
The tarot card pictured above is about jumping without a safety net. It’s about trusting in life and not requiring a road map or a guarantee about what is to come. The card represents a faith in the life process. The pink clouds underneath indicate there is a safe landing for those who are willing to take the quantum leap into the unknown.
As with the fool card , this card indicates that in order to trust we need to focus on that which cannot be taken away.
The description of this card states:
That which can be taken away from you is not worth keeping, and that which cannot be taken away from you, why should one be afraid of its being taken away? It cannot be taken away, there is no possibility. You cannot lose your real treasure”.
I’m big on honoring that we do become attached to others and we do experience loss when we “lose” those whom we love. Beyond that, we feel “loss” when we lose a job we care about, or various other things that matter to us.
Yet, I think the idea of a more comprehensive sort of trust in life itself has something to teach us.
Letting Go & Trusting In Life
What do we learn by letting go and trusting in life?
Do you know the feeling of synchronicity when everything seems to line up and doors seem to open? It may be in a new relationship, a job, or any other endeavor? Your “timing” is impeccable in these moments.
You encounter someone you’ve been thinking about or who has a piece of information you’ve been seeking. A book on a subject you need information about practically jumps off the shelf at you. There is more “at work” or play than meets the eye in life, in us. Synchronicity (or serendipity) is the magic of life, it’s where the juice is. It’s being in “the zone”.
Have you noticed that synchronicity seems to happen when you experience trust in a situation? And when you feel passion about something? It’s almost a feeling of being led in a particular direction, or you receive “signs” that indicate you’re heading in the right direction.
Joseph at the beach
The Foundation of Trusting in Life & Love
What would help you build a foundation that would enable you to trust in life and love?
Trust, or lack of trust, begins to develop early in life.
If you’ve had caregivers who were not there for you or were untrustworthy, you’ve likely developed trust issues.
There are ways to restore your trust in love and life. It begins by recognizing that change begins from the inside out and that love is generated from the inside out.
This is great news because it means you have the power to change your life. You don’t need to wait for something to come along in order for you to feel better – and that includes to increase your sense of trust in love and life.
We’re going to be talking about how you go about restoring your belief in love and life a lot more.
What Is Your Experience
- Do you trust in love and life?
- Do you feel excited about life?
- Are you willing to take leaps of faith and step into the unknown?
- What are you afraid you might lose?
- Have you experienced stepping into the unknown and feeling supported in remarkable, unexpected ways?
- What have been your experiences with serendipity?
I’d love to hear your thoughts on trust. In the meantime, be well, and may you experience the best relationships ever and safe landings.
{ 12 comments… read them below or add one }
I had never given much thought so specifically to “trusting in love and life” but now that I think about it I can’t think of anything I trust more than love and life.
I literally live to love and be loved and life is where such happens. The unknown is like Disneyland to me, a place where one can dance and let go and experience excitement – and maybe get beat up a little bit but one can exit the unknown as quickly as they entered, brush themselves off and jump back in after, perhaps, a little nap and/or some CPR. The unknown is an area where “happy” can be so real. And we can choose our unknown, our paths.
Anyway, to paraphrase the words of a historic icon: Give me love and life (liberty) or give me raw liver (death).
Give me tidbits from Lauren Sierra Thomas’ flexible mind any old day.
Dear Ernesto,
Ah, it’s so nice to have your visit and hear your entertaining words of wisdom once again. I especially love your words about the unknown being like Disneyland. An awesome perspective you have of life, Ernesto.
How cool to think that we can jump back out of the unknown and plant our feet on the ground. I’ve found that we can, except those times wherein life takes us for the ride no matter. At those times, resistance is futile, as another historic icon once said.
Okay, the raw liver had me laughing out loud. You are a words craftsman all the way.
It’s so great to have your visits and have the opportunity to hear and mull over your insights.
Thanks for visiting.
Hugs,
Lauren
Lauren´s last blog ..The Happy Face Syndrome: Are You Caught In The Trap?
Hello Lauren
This post did make me think about where we begin to lose trust in love and life. Although I do trust in life, at this time I can’t say I would place my dollar on the bet of finding true love again. But what the heck what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas.
Becky Johnson
Hey Becky,
I love it! What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas! Yes, playing can be fun too.
I am placing my dollar on true love, though. It’s what my Best Relationships Ever site and next e-book is all about. And I’m not saying that to plug it, but rather because it’s the driving force behind the blog.
Discovering this painful dilemma people have in desiring love and no longer believing it’s possible started me on a quest. I truly feel I’ve recognized a way through this dilemma and back into a place of restoring a belief in love.
I’m going to be talking about it a lot more on the blog and in a couple “freebies” that I’ll be passing on to my readers.
So, stay tuned. You never know, maybe you will place your dollar on true love. If not, I hear ya girl, there’s always Vegas (smile).
Thanks for visiting and warm regards,
Lauren
Lauren´s last blog ..The Happy Face Syndrome: Are You Caught In The Trap?
Hi Lauren
I have not lost trust in life or love but I know many people who have. There are many times in life when we can hit a bump in the road. This bump can hurt our faith and trust in life and love (sometimes even shatter it). As time goes on our wounds heal and our trust can be restored if we stay open to the possibilities. Thank you for a beautiful post on this subject.
Wendy
Dear Wendy,
You make a great point and one that needed mentioning. We do experience some major bumps, even boulders, along the way. And sometimes we’re even are shattered. I know I’ve been there, more than once in my lifetime.
Resilience is a remarkable thing, though. We don’t really know why some people are resilient and others are taken down and don’t get back up.
I’ve always said I’m willing to visit a place like “shattered”, but I’m not willing to live there.
I find it exciting to feel intact in my trust in love and life. Realizing it was a process inside myself rather than something “out there” that someone needed to bring to me made all the difference.
Looking forward to sharing more about how we can restore our faith in love and life. I feel it’s about as important topic as there can be.
Nice to have you visit and look forward to hearing from you again!
Warm regards,
Lauren
P.S. By the way, my sister’s name is Wendy and I’m quite partial to the name. I love it!
Lauren´s last blog ..The Happy Face Syndrome: Are You Caught In The Trap?
Dear Lauren,
I think I’m going the other way on this journey. Since my family life in my early years involved negativity and lack of trust, it’s been a blessing to awaken to independence in adulthood… and to learn from life, love, and teachers like you.
Not that there IS anyone quite like you Lauren, because there is not!
One of my favorite synchronicities is the way the answers appear just as soon as you ask the questions. The universe really is conspiring in our favor. (I don’t know who said that but I love it) As long as we are open to the beauty of all we deserve in our relationships, we have it. Not to oversimplify!
As you said, love is generated from the inside out.
I’m going to get a stone halo like Joseph today at the beach
Have a wonderful Sunday,
Love, Lisa
Dear Lisa Marie,
My feeling too is that it’s a blessing to be an independent adult awakening.
Synchronicity to me is like the universe winking at us, letting us know we’re in the mix. As in your example. Yes, the universe is conspiring in our favor it seems (great statement).
Your simplification is so accurate, I believe. We can receive the beauty of all we deserve IF we are open to it and BELIEVE we deserve it. How beautifully put!
May you enjoy your stone halo like the beautiful being you are, Lisa Marie, so very deserving.
Thank you for your lovely compliment. I feel the same toward you.
Love,
Lauren
Lauren´s last blog ..Do You Trust In Love and Life?
Such a strong post Lauren!
Trust in self, Trust In life, the ability to life with openness – we do need to keep that alive.
It is after years go by and we allow life’s heartbreaks (dreams that never came true, hurt by friends, lovers and and broken promises – ones others made to us and ones we made to ourselves) – allow them to harden us and narrow our life. – but to get up again and live again – that is powerful
I do trust life (that took a mighty long minute, many many years) and live with excitement – there was a moment when I made the decision that I wasn’t going to have my life experience stolen from me. Regardless of the potential agony I was going to life the width, depth and everything in between – the side effect was, I got better at getting up faster after being knocked down.
Aileen´s last blog ..Snakes Shed Their Skin and So Do We…Breathe Through Life’s Changes
Dear Aileen,
I love your words and I can feel that in you – your decision to not have your “life experience stolen from me”. What a beautiful way of describing your decision.
It is a process regaining our trust in love and life. At least that’s what I found. Yet, as you point out, I believe it’s a decision we make. A decision about the quality of life we choose to experience and how we’re going to ensure that life for ourselves. It’s a perspective.
Always good to hear from you and hear your insights, Aileen.
Warmest regards,
Lauren
Lauren´s last blog ..What Is Love?
Hi Lauren – Great post. And so interesting, what your friend said about midlife. I think that we lose trust at that point because we’re trying to do the second half of life the way we did the first half. And it just doesn’t work! Because wonderful is different in the second half of life. But it’s a time to start the cycle again, delve a little deeper, find our way back to that lovely Fool you speak of. And then, isn’t it glorious?
Patty – Why Not Start Now?´s last blog ..Meaning Mondays: The Four Healing Salves
Dearest Patty,
Indeed it is glorious! I’m loving the embracement of life and love.
You make a great point – the second half of life has a different flavor to it. We have many life experiences and we get to CHOOSE our perspective – how we view our experiences. Are we victims or creators? Creators in the sense of choosing a perspective that creates greater joy in our life experience while still embracing that life is an ebb and flow of the light and the darkness (as you are so willing to acknowledge!).
It’s so lovely having you share here.
Warmest regards,
Lauren
Lauren´s last blog ..What Is Love?